


For the Rest of My Life, For the Rest of Yours - For the Rest of Ours

by alienarcher



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Also they're already boyfriends, Canon Compliant, Dean is actually really soft with Cas, Fix-It of Sorts, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Just lots of gentle touches, Light Angst, Like one brief mention of sex literally not a biggie, Like you will literally choke on all the fluff that I shoved in here, M/M, Missing Scene, They're both very soft with each other, You're basically either gonna hate this or love this depending on how sappy you are, lots of fluff, talking about their feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-20
Updated: 2018-04-20
Packaged: 2019-04-25 09:43:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,856
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14376156
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alienarcher/pseuds/alienarcher
Summary: Heaven might shut down, and Cas - for the first time in years - starts questioning his decisions. He thinks it might be his fault, but Dean is always there to comfort him and make sure he knows the truth.





	For the Rest of My Life, For the Rest of Yours - For the Rest of Ours

Castiel had doubts before, of course he did. But it was never like this. Then, it was quite a simple choice – Heaven or the Winchesters. Both alive and well, just fighting – and he needed to pick a side. Dean, Sam and everyone around them became a better family to him in months than the Heaven ever was in centuries. And, it all came down to Dean, really. Cas hasn’t been a “proper” angel for a very long time. He fell in love, and there isn’t anything yet that has been more important to him than Dean. Now, he isn’t so sure.

Heaven might shut down. He can’t face the thought of a place he once called home disappearing. Not only that, but all his siblings disappearing too. And he does still care about them, in many ways. Some more than the others.

Gabriel. He was once one of Castiel’s closest brothers, and when he went away, Cas understood him, even though he couldn’t admit it back then. It’s easier now, Castiel realizes Gabriel just fell in love. Except, he fell in love with running. And, maybe a little bit with himself.

For the first time in years, Cas is asking himself, if he made the right choice. Some of the things that have been happening on Earth and in Heaven are his fault, some are Dean and Sam’s. And, Castiel has been helping them from almost the very beginning. What if he was resisting with his siblings instead? Would it change something? Maybe it would, but it wouldn’t change him.

The Winchesters changed him. Team Free Will, Sam and – of course – Dean. Being human, being God, being Lucifer, being in Purgatory – everything significant that has ever happened to him was after he met Dean. He became a better version of himself – of that he is sure. Of what he isn’t sure is how selfish it is to think about yourself and your journey first, before thinking about your family, or your planet. Are his divine siblings even his family? He isn’t sure of that either. He is sure of one thing, though: every time he comes back to the bunker, he comes back to his heart.

 

===

 

Dean is sitting in the front room of the bunker, sipping his beer. Sam retreated to his room about an hour ago, maybe going to bed earlier, maybe going off to read something, maybe to think. Sam isn’t okay – definitely not. But, they’ve seen much harder times, and they’ve never really been okay in the first place. So, rather than worrying about Sam, he’s thinking that he should probably go and stitch up his bloody face. But, he doesn’t do that either. Instead, he thinks about Cas. He should come back in no time – he will, and then he’ll heal him with a snap of his fingers. Or, rather, a touch of his palm.

Dean isn’t sure what would happen to him, if something happened to Cas again. If he died again. He has never been so broken, so shallow before. He was so hurt, in fact, that he confessed his feelings about Cas to Sam. And, confessing his feelings about Cas, or confessing his feelings about anything, really, has never been in the cards before, so that’s saying something. 

Whenever Dean thought about him and Cas before, which – to be fair – happened very rarely (with Dean repressing his feelings as hard as he can and whatnot), he always thought that he would just sometimes fuck Cas into his mattress, and sometimes Cas would fuck him into his own, and that would be it. They do that too, and – to be completely honest - quite often. But, Dean also finds himself opening up to Cas. Being gentler, more tender, though not in general – just with Cas. No one, apart from the two of them, will ever know how loving Dean Winchester can really be. He loves that, by some reason.

 

===

 

Dean hears a familiar sound of wings.

‘Dean’, Cas calls, more out of habit than out of necessity. Dean is the first thing he saw, when he landed in the bunker, ‘What happened?’

Castiel comes closer to him, looking incredibly worried, like his boyfriend has some fatal wounds, instead of a couple of scratches. 

‘I’m fine’, Dean says, but when Cas looks at him strictly, changes his answer, ‘Ok, maybe i’m not entirely fine. But, I’m not dead, right? And, you aren’t either. That’s pretty much all I need to be at least relatively fine’.

Castiel’s eyes become softer, his blues even more welcoming than they usually are. He takes a final step closer to Dean and gently puts his hand on his forehead. After just a second, Dean is a bit more comfortable without a bloody face, feeling a trace of his boyfriend’s lips on his forehead instead.

‘So’, Cas sighs, sitting down in a chair next to Dean, ‘What happened?’

‘Well, the short version’, Dean gestures, half-empty bear bottle in his hand, ‘We found Rowena, Sam almost killed her, she almost killed him, Billie was there for a moment, told me we’re gonna see each other again soon, apparently, but now it’s all good. And, Rowena’s gonna help us now’.

‘You forgot an important part’, Cas says, after nodding, and Dean looks at him confused, ‘Your face’.

‘Oh, right’, Dean chuckles a bit, ‘Just a fight with one of Rowena’s minions. Nothing much’.

Castiel smiles softly, putting a hand on Dean’s left that’s lying on the table. He did that a lot – hand touching and forehead kisses were his favorite things. Dean thought he’d probably shown him too many chick flicks, but there was no turning back now. He secretly enjoyed it too.

‘How are you?’, Dean asks, after a moment of comfortable silence, ‘Managed to chat with the angels?’

‘Yes, actually’, Cas sighs, pulling his hand away, but Dean catches it before he can. He usually tries not to think about why he does what he does when he’s with Cas. He just follows his gut without asking questions. Cas looks up at him, ‘Heaven might shut down’.

‘What?’

‘Yeah’, Cas sighs, looking down again, but leaving his hand intertwined with Dean’s this time, ‘There are almost no angels left. Heaven looses its power. And, if it shuts down for good, all the souls from there will land on Earth. It would lead to so much death and destruction’.

Castiel closes his eyes for a second, and Dean squeezes his hand a bit, ‘They need someone really powerful to keep it running’.

‘Someone like an archangel?’, Dean asks, and Cas simply nods, looking up at their hands now, ‘Well then. We should find Gabriel, take a bit of his grace for ourselves and then kick him back to heaven. Then, we’re all good’.

‘It can’t be easy, Dean’, Cas sighs, ‘He isn’t easy. He’s been running this whole time, just like me. And, it’s really hard to stop running’.

‘There is a huge difference between you too’ , Dean says, making Cas stand up with him, so they could properly face each other, ‘He’s been running from someone – from Heaven, or God, or his brothers, maybe all three. You’ve been running to someone’. 

Castiel smiles softly, and Dean puts his hand on his boyfriend’s waist, ‘There is something you have in common, though’, Dean makes a dramatic pause, waiting for their eyes to lock again, before he continues speaking. When they finally do, he says, ‘In the end, you both always make the right choice and do the right thing. It happened with him before. He almost left us in that motel, and then came back to save us. And he did’. 

They stood in silence for a bit, Dean’s hand still wrapped around Castiel’s waist.

‘Naomi is alive’, Cas says, and Dean takes a step back.

‘What?’

‘Yes, apparently I didn’t kill her. Hurt her plenty, she was recovering this whole time. But, she isn’t dead’.

‘Jeez, how are you?’, Dean asks, a worried look on his face.

‘Not very- well. About her too, and just generally. I don’t know. Everything she did to me came back, and then the whole Heaven thing. I just don’t know what to think or feel’, Cas says, looking a bit broken.

‘Hey’, Dean whispers, gently taking Castiel’s arm into his hand, stopping him from drifting away (he’s stopping someone from drifting away, and not the other way around – who would’ve thought?), ‘None of this is your fault. You know that, right?’

‘How am I supposed to know that?’, Cas asks a bit harshly, but it doesn’t push Dean away, ‘How do you know that? Maybe if I didn’t do something or did do something. Just, act differently. Maybe, none of this would’ve happened’.

There was a shadow of doubt in Dean’s mind. What if he regrets helping them? What if he regrets being with him? Dean needs to prove Cas that he made the right choice. He needs to show him how much he cares about him, because he does - a lot.

‘Look, Cas. None of this is your fault. And you know how I know that?’, he asks, pulling his boyfriend a bit closer, ‘Because I know you. And you’re one of the best people I know on this son of a bitch of an Earth. And you’re definitely the best angel. And, I know that, because I know them too. I know how they are, what they think, what decisions they made. Just, think about it, Cas. Really think about it. Everything that’s happening with Heaven is because of the assholes, who run it – not because of you. Think of Naomi, Cas. She ran Heaven for some time, and look what she did. To angels, to people on Earth, to Heaven’, Dean swallows, ‘To you’. 

There is a moment of silence, when they're both just contemplating each other, 'I needed you, Cas. And you were there for me. I still need you, and you're still here. I hope you know that I'm always here too'.

Cas hugs him tight, letting out a heavy sigh Dean feels he’s been holding in for quite some time. After standing in the middle of the room like that for couple of minutes, Cas pulls away, smiling, but looking a bit tired.

‘You are uncharacteristically optimistic today’, Castiel says carefully.

‘Well, maybe I should be more uncharacteristic, if you like it so much’, Dean smirks.

‘You’re great just as you are’, Cas smiles.

‘Nope’, Dean says, full on grinning at this point, ‘No. Nah-ah. Too sappy. Waaay too sappy. Remind me to never show you any movies that involve any sort of romance ever again, you’re horrible’.

‘Horrible?', Cas asks, his smile dropping, and Dean can see that he's unsure how to take that. Sometimes he forgets his boyfriend is mostly incapable of understanding sarcasm.

'Just joking, Cas', Dean swiftly pecks his lips, ‘Come on. You look tired and I am tired, so let’s go to bed. I’ll sleep and you’ll pretend to sleep, or whatever it is you do, while I’m sleeping’.

‘I watch over you’, Cas says, smiling again. 

Dean smiles back.

**Author's Note:**

> hope you enjoyed this ! thank you very much for reading , i really appreciate it .


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